The Three Little Pigs Revisited

The Mother:

Once upon a time in a land far away

A mother raised three little pigs

She took them aside one bright summer day

“It’s time that you have your own digs”

The First Little Pig:

My mother told me to build my own house

That sounds like very hard work

I’d rather play hopscotch and eat boiled grouse         

That wolf ‘s just a big dopey jerk

The easiest plan is a house made of straw

I can build that in less than an hour

That straw will get stuck in the bad wolf's craw

This piglet he’ll never devour

The Wolf:

That lazy little pig is a small-time goof

About wolves he doesn’t know beans

With two big puffs I’ll blow down his roof

And eat him with couscous and greens

So he huffed and he puffed and he blew the house down and he ate up the first little pig

The Second Little Pig:

The second little pig made his house out of sticks

To avoid the cruel fate of his brother

But the big bad wolf saw through all of his tricks

“This pig will be tastier than the other”

And he huffed and puffed and he blew the house down and he ate the second little pig

The Third Little Pig:

That big old wolf is one scary dude

He can knock down a house with his breath

I’ll have to be very piggy shrewd

So that wolf cannot put me to death

I’m going to build my new house very strong

Maybe iron or copper or brick

To build it that strong will take very long

But that brick will make my walls thick

The Wolf:

Here is another ridiculous pig

Bricks can't stop a huge wolf like me

I'll eat this pig with a parsley sprig

And maybe a glass of chablis

And he huffed and he puffed and he huffed some more but the brick house stood strong.

Epilogue:

The wolf went home and ate pebbles and twigs

Then he gave an enormous burp

Out of his mouth popped the two little pigs

“So long, Mister Wolf, you’re a twerp!”

And the three little pigs in their thick brick house lived happily ever after