We’re pretty good friends, me and Stephen Colbert
He tells me new jokes every night
Disgust with Trump, that’s a main thing we share
We’re pretty good friends, me and Stephen Colbert
Steve could know me better but I don’t care
When he comes to Cincy we will be so tight
We’re pretty good friends, me and Stephen Colbert
He tells me new jokes every night
Untouched for eight months, a pandemic beard
Three oldies mistook me for Gabby Hayes
The message: We’re stuck in a time that is weird
Untouched for eight months, a pandemic beard
By New Years I hope that I’ll have this beard sheared
But only if first I’ve reduced my malaise
Untouched for eight months, a pandemic beard
Three oldies mistook me for Gabby Hayes
Eighty-Three
My eighty-third birthday to me was a fright
Who could imagine I’d still be around?
The perils of old age still leave me uptight
My eighty-third birthday to me was a fright
Though reaching eight decades I’ve done something right
Thanks to whiskey and Miltown I’m still above ground
My eighty-third birthday to me was a a fright
Who could imagine I’d still be around?
Loneliness
All my friends have gone away
A fact that leaves me lonely
No chums left with whom to play
All my friends have gone away
I wake each morn to loss, dismay
Finding myself only
All my friends have gone away
A fact that leaves me lonely
The Worst Idea
This is the worst idea of all
Each hour that we’re here, one hour closer to death
The very thought of it casts a dark pall
This is the worst idea of all
The truth is we need to confront our downfall
Every creature on earth has to breathe their last breath
This is the worst idea of all
Each hour that we’re here, one hour closer to death
Polymalgia Rheumatica
I wake each morn in abject pain
My arms, my legs, my shoulders, my spine
To walk ten steps, a cruel strain
I wake each morn in abject pain
By afternoon I’ve made some gain
My knees, surprise, now feel just fine
I wake each morn in abject pain
My arms, my legs, my shoulders, my spine
Too Many Docs
It seems like I go to a doctor each week
The lung doc, the heart doc, the skin doc and more
My body’s turned into a creaky antique
It seems like I go to the doctor each week
Each visit I’m sure that my prospects are bleak
But the doc always says he finds life in my core
It seems like I go to the doctor each week
The lung doc, the heart doc, the skin doc, and more
The number one thing about where we live
We’re three blocks from Burnet Woods park
The museum, the lake, the civil war cannons
And the bandstand's a Clifton landmark
Burnet’s been there for a century and a half
The lake, Eighteen Seventy-Five
There’s a pink granite monument at the southern edge
And a trapeze on MLK Drive
The woods have a network of hiking trails
We forget that we’re still in the city
One hikes up and down in the hills and ravines
Each view that we see, still more pretty
Our park also has an old-time playground
With its swings and a tall concrete slide
Built in the thirties by the WPA
Cardboard speeds up each little kid’s ride
The bandstand has concerts each Wednesday eve
Maybe folk or classical or rock
Fantastic fireworks on the Fourth of July
People watch from the lakside sidewalk
A hippy built a labyrinth in the park
It was hidden far off in the trees
The authorities forced him to take it all down
The labyrinth man said they were sleaze
Fishermen hang out at Burnet Woods lake
Hunting catfish and bass and brown trout
A guy once showed me his three-foot catch
The size of it made me freak out
One winter I gathered some kindling from the woods
And filled up the rack on my car
The cops were watching, said put it all back
I still think their policy bizarre
When J was a kid we would sled at Burnet
The best spot, right near Skyline Chili
You have to watch for the trees at the end
The sleds almost fly, it’s so hilly
To me Burnet Woods is a slice of heaven
It’s freedom and beauty and rest
Most of all, it’s escape from the trials of life
Pay a visit, you'll soon be de-stressed
